54 More Days..

Its 54 more days to my big day but somehow i don't feel happy at all.. It seems that a lot of bad things have been happening around me.

Firstly, angry with one of my "good" friend that she can abandon me for lunch when one of the other colleague call her out early to buy lunch. My thought was that is that friend more important than me or am i not that important to her at all. I have been upset on her on this issue for one week. Today when i see her again, i am still very upset.

Next is the grandmother brother pass away and my parents went to the wake and even will be attending the sending off of the funeral. I am their daughter and i am getting married soon. why can't they think of how unlucky it will be for me if they go and attend the wake?? My father even expect me to attend the wake too.. OMG!! What kind of father do i have?? One who care about relative we seldom contact and don't care about his own daughter..

Next is my new house.. Till now, renovation has not been done and my stupid boyfriend keep playing mission impossible. Let's imagine what would happen if the renovation is not complete on time and that we do not ahve a new house to go to for my wedding day!! Let's imagine..

I feel that i am getting real stress up on all this issue and really do not have interest to work anymore. Been feeling sad and down and nothing could make me happy and i even have to feel worse with all this issue happening around me..

WHAT SHOULD I DO??

FCSA 2008

I have never ever imagine that something like this will happen.. My computation was wrong for the submission and end up we receive a Bronze instead of a Gold and the maximum we can appeal up to is Silver. I was very sad over this and no matter what i do cannot salvage this situation anymore. How am i to tell my boys on this?? "Mdm made an error in the computation and we cannot get Gold anymore because of this" everyone has put in their effort in 2008 to achieve the best but it is all because of my stupid mistake that everything ends up this way.. I really do not know how to face my scouts, my leaders and my school.. Being crying ever since i know the result but i know this won't help at all.. What can i do to compensate the loss of the gold badge?? who can help me??

Counting down to my big day!!

haizzz.. 8 more months and my big day is here.. but somehow i do not feel nervous at all.. why neh?? haizzz.. a lot of things have been happening during the last few months ever since 2009 started.. I am not happy at all.. Is 2009 really going to be a bad year for me?? These few days were in contact with Qingguo and it seems we have been missing a lot of each other lifes for the past one year. A lot of catching up was done and he as usual, has give me the confidence to talk to him on my fears.. That day i even scream at him as he ask me a question which i hate to hear "Where is Shihui?" The mention of her name makes my blood boil.. eeeeeee.... Now i keep seeing her name as we share the same friends in facebook.. To make it sound ugly, who is she to be sharing our past when she was not there most of the time?? haizz.. When can i ever get over the hurt she has applied on me??

Bloody Bitch

I cannot tahan.. I really hate her loh.. Damn irritating woman.. Have been secretly viewing her blog.. and today went to check on her old blog and realise that she has an accident before.. The first thought that come to my mind is "WHY SHE NEVER DIE??" Imagine such horrible thoughts have been going through my mind... Can someone help me?? I do not want to be always unhappy when i see or hear anything of her.. Who can help me??

Andy Lau Concert in 2008

The concert was pro loh!!! Although his dressing was not that fantastic, the background effect of the show was very very very good!! Andy was handsome and his singing was !!!! I do not know which word should i use to describe but i really love it!!

Chiangmai Trip 08

2 more days and i will be going to Thailand again.. Last year December i went to Chiangmai with my Scout Troop and this year i will be going with my boyfriend.. We will be spending 4 days in Chiangmai and 2 days in Bangkok itself.. A month ago, riots were up at Bangkok and i was then worried that my trip will be affected. Then thoughts of my friends being disappointed come to my mind.. Finally we do not have to worry anymore and off we will be going in 2 days time.. Yupeeeeee

T-Shirts

From the start, i sense that there will be a lot of disagreement on this issue and i have make it a point that i do not want to be involve in this. I do not want to be the one conveting the message to the seniors and i do not want to involve the juniors on the decision!! Conclusion i do not want to be the middleman!! Why is it that frustration are vent on me?? I did not do anything but yet I am the one that ganna.. Why why why?? I know you all don't like me and hope that i will leave here as soon as possible.. But is it fair for me?? I come here becoz of the boys but yet I don't know if what i am doing is actually benefitting the troop.. If someone would come forward and tell me that what i have done is wrong and if i leave, it will be better for everyone i will go.. But why is this happening to me?? Do i really fail as a leader?? Do i???